How big the problem is
- 2022: nearly 70,000 people reported a romance scam to the FTC, with $1.3 billion in reported losses and a median loss of $4,400 (FTC Data Spotlight).
- 2023: 64,003 reports, $1.14 billion in reported losses, median $2,000 per person (FTC).
- Where it starts: in 2022, 40% of people who lost money said contact began on social media and 19% on a dating site or app. The FTC's 2026 social media spotlight found social media remained the top starting point (FTC).
These are only the cases people reported. The FTC notes that most fraud is never reported, so the real numbers are higher.
Check who you are talking to
Private search. They are never notified.
The lies scammers tell most
The FTC analyzed reports and found the same stories over and over (source):
- I'm in the military, stationed far away. (The most common.)
- I work on an offshore oil rig, or as a doctor or engineer abroad.
- I can teach you to invest in crypto.
- I'm sending you a valuable package, but you need to pay customs or a fee.
- I'm sick, hurt or in jail and need money.
- Send me photos (then threats to share them: sextortion).
The warning signs, in the order they usually appear
- A fast, intense connection. Constant messages, "soulmate" talk within days.
- Moving off the platform. To WhatsApp, Telegram, Google Chat or text.
- A reason they can't meet or video call. Deployment, an oil rig, a broken camera.
- A test request. A small favor or small amount, to see if you will pay.
- A crisis. Medical bills, a frozen account, a customs fee, a plane ticket.
- An unusual payment method. Gift cards, crypto, wire transfers, payment apps to a stranger, or asking you to receive and forward money. In 2022, 24% of people who lost money paid with gift cards, and crypto plus bank wires made up more than 60% of reported losses.
- Secrecy and pressure. "Don't tell your family, they won't understand us."
Run your situation through the free romance scam red-flag checker. It takes two minutes and nothing you enter leaves your device.
What to do if you see these signs
- Stop sending money or gifts. Do not "send one last payment" to recover earlier ones.
- Reverse-search their photos and search the name they gave you. See how to check if someone is real.
- Talk to a friend or family member you trust. Scammers rely on isolation.
- Report to ReportFraud.ftc.gov, IC3.gov and the app or site where you met.
- If you already paid, follow what to do if you were scammed today; speed matters for bank and card disputes.