Scams · 5 min read

Military romance scams: how to spot a fake soldier

Short answer

Pretending to be deployed overseas is the single most common lie romance scammers tell, according to the FTC. Real service members can video call, do not need you to pay for leave, flights, "care packages" or communication fees, and never need gift cards.

Why scammers pretend to be soldiers

A deployment explains everything a scammer needs explained: why he can't meet, why he can't video call, why calls drop, and why he can't access his own money. Photos are stolen from real service members' social media, which is why the uniform and name tape often look right.

Check the name he gave you

Private search. They are never notified.

Requests a real service member will not make

  • Money to "request leave" or buy a plane ticket home. The military handles leave and travel.
  • Fees for a phone, internet or satellite connection.
  • Payment to a "military agent" or "diplomat" to ship a box of valuables or release funds.
  • Gift cards, crypto or wire transfers for anything.
  • Help with medical bills. Service members have military health care.

How to check

  1. Reverse-search his photos. Stolen military photos are among the most reported on scam-photo sites.
  2. Search the name with a city or hometown. Often you will find the real soldier, under the same photos, with a family and a different life.
  3. Ask for a live video call. Deployed troops video chat with family routinely.
  4. Never pay anyone who claims to be a commanding officer, agent or diplomat on his behalf.

Questions

Do soldiers have to pay to go on leave?

No. Military leave is an administrative process. Nobody pays a fee, and partners are never asked to pay for it.

Can deployed soldiers video call?

Generally yes, depending on location and operations. Long-term, total refusal to video call is a scam sign.

Know who you are talking to

Search a name or phone number to see public profiles and photos before you meet.

Sources

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Published 2026-10-28 by the TrueSearch Safety Team. This guide is general information, not legal advice. In an emergency call 911.

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